I can remember, as a little girl, feeling close to God, knowing he existed. I was baptized and raised in the church by parents who were active members and believed themselves to be “faithful.” While in Nashville we went from a rigid, strict Episcopalian church to a more free-form, non-denominational one with a female pastor who preferred to preach barefoot. She actually bears a striking resemblance to Gerard’s minister Leddy Hammock. We attended a Methodist church when we moved to Lynchburg and our pastor’s name was Bob, Father Bob. I insisted on calling him “Father God” which I’m sure he found both endearing and embarrassing. As I grew older I realized that while my mother was actively involved with the Lord, my father aired on the side of agnosticism and didn’t claim to know who or what existed “up there.” Years after their divorce my mother married a Catholic conservative, so we stopped talking about religion.

I found Gerard’s first entry to be too confessional, too revelatory, but as I started to read “Mother-Father God” I wanted to open up and write about my own experiences. It feels more like a story rather than a private conversation I shouldn’t have overheard. We learn about her mother and father, her mother’s abusive relationship, her journey with religion as well as her parent’s. It is, in some ways, more welcoming, more inviting.  Initially, I wasn’t sure I liked or understood, the segway into the discovery of certain scientific phenomena or the discussion of “mesmerism” and “hysteria.” It becomes clear that she’s getting into the creation of Christian Science, which connects with her parents interest in the New Thought Movement, but I’m not sure what purpose this tangent serves. Is it necessary for Gerard to give us a full history lesson on the development of Christian Science?

Aside from eliciting my own confessional response, this essay calls legal precedent into question, particularly regarding mental health and spousal abuse. Gerard begins to do more than tell a personal story. She has concerns about the standard protocol with victims of spousal abuse, concerns that I’m sure resonate with many of her readers. Mental health is unfortunately still a taboo subject. Gerard addresses not only her own uncomfortable or personal journeys, but also the secrets of society, the things we’d rather keep behind closed doors, the skeletons in our closets.